a swiftie's issue with the tortured poets department

it's not that good. admit it to yourself.

Ok hear me out: some of y’all will just blindly follow the popular opinion without thinking for yourself. People are allowed to not like things! Some Swifties were going ballistic over a review from Paste Magazine that gave The Tortured Poets Department a 3.6 (generous, in my opinion), and I find this immediate defence to be very mindless.

As someone who loves the majority of Swift’s music (after experiencing Red in 2013, then being told Taylor Swift wasn’t cool, so went through a ‘Taylor Swift is lame’ phase (but Wildest Dreams was my secret guilty pleasure) for the next 7 or so years, then re-listened to All Too Well and heard Delicate for the first time and was gradually a fan again), I think I can say confidently that this certainly isn’t her best album.

It took some time for Midnights to grow on me too, but I must admit, at the time, I was thinking, this is pretty good, but it definitely won’t win a Grammy (and I wasn’t sure it deserved one, either). 

It sometimes fell a little flat and wasn’t as lyrically on point (for me) as its predecessors, Evermore and Folklore, though those are hard standards to beat. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good album, well written, and has some absolute banging bonus tracks. 

However, I don’t think it deserved to win Album of the Year. It just wasn’t as polished or innovative as some of the other albums in the running, and some of the production just wasn’t really my personal taste. Not to mention some of Taylor’s interesting behaviour at the Grammys… that deserves its own post.

But in comparison to The Tortured Poets Department, Midnights looks like a paragon of virtue. TTPD is a bit of an unedited, rushed mess. It feels clunky and tired, and like an echo of Midnights in its production. Everyone was expecting, due to the cover art and promotion, for it to be more in the vein of Folklore/Evermore, maybe with a hint of the Midnights sound. 

Instead, we got an unfiltered carbon copy of the previous album’s production. While I did appreciate the diaristic style, it sometimes felt like all the songwriters looked at some of the lyrics and just said ‘Yep! That’s fine!’

I mean…

You smoked, then ate seven bars of chocolate

We declared Charlie Puth should be a bigger artist

I scratch your head, you fall asleep

Like a tattooed golden retriever

•

My friends used to play a game where

We would pick a decade

We wished we could live in instead of this

I'd say the 1830s but without all the racists and getting married off for

the highest bid

•

You know how to ball, I know Aristotle

Brand new, full-throttle

Touch me while your bros play Grand Theft Auto

Need I say more?

There’s also a strange attack on her own fans who were (rightfully) questioning her choice to date Matty Healy, a musician who has a history of condoning racist behaviour. While understandably the level of scrutiny her fans apply to her and her dating life is surely hard to deal with and unwarranted, celebrities should be held accountable for their choices. Her fans ultimately had her best interest at heart, too.

This scathing address is in the song ‘But Daddy I Love Him’ in which she practically declares that their opinions only matter if they’re positive.

I'd rather burn my whole life down

Than listen to one more second of all this b*tching and moaning

I'll tell you something about my good name

It's mine alone to disgrace

I don't cater to all these vipers dressed in empath's clothing

God save the most judgmental creeps

Who say they want what's best for me

Sanctimoniously performing soliloquies I'll never see

Of course fans can be toxic and awful, but Taylor’s fans are the most loyal in the world. They’ll defend her to the ends of the earth, but when they try to hold her accountable for questionable choices, she turns on them.

I’d also like to draw attention to how the song ‘imgonnagetyouback’ has a very similar concept (though the sound is different) to Olivia Rodrigo’s ‘get him back!’. This would be fine, except Taylor did pressure Olivia into giving her and Jack Antonoff writing credits for her 2021 song ‘deja vu’, which was inspired, sound wise, by Taylor’s song ‘Cruel Summer’. As a fan of both songs, I honestly only hear a similarity in how Olivia shouts the outro. However, I don’t think this is enough to warrant writing credits—plenty of artists are inspired by others, and only when Olivia’s song became popular enough did Taylor seek credit.

I think it’s a bit hypocritical of Taylor to release such a similar song after she has criticised Olivia for doing the same thing.

Here are Olivia’s verses:

I wanna get him back

I wanna make him really jealous, wanna make him feel bad

Oh, I wanna get him back

'Cause then again, I really miss him, and it makes me real sad

Oh, I want sweet revenge

And I want him again

I want to get him back, back, back

•

I wanna key his car

I wanna make him lunch

I wanna break his heart

And be the one to stitch it up

Wanna kiss his face

With an uppercut

I wanna meet his mom
Just to tell her her son sucks

In comparison to Taylor’s:

Whether I'm gonna be your wife or

Gonna smash up your bike, I haven't decided yet

But I'm gonna get you back

Whether I'm gonna curse you out or

Take you back to my house, I haven't decidеd yet

But I'm gonna get you back

My last issue with the album is how lengthy the deluxe version is. Not all songs written should be released, and this Anthology clearly displays that. If you’re going to release music, I believe it should be a polished album with the best version of the tracks possible. The Anthology feels like she just dropped all her drafts rather than provide a confident, refined experience. It’s a very ‘Age of Streaming’ album—it doesn’t have to be long; just good.

To end on a positive note, I did enjoy ‘So Long, London’, which is a heart-wrenching ballad that beautifully intertwines her feelings and imagery of the city (though it does sound like she’s blaming the end of her relationship on Joe Alwyn’s depression?). ‘Florida!!!’ features Florence + The Machine in an explosion, and is, in short, a brilliant collaboration. I also liked the delusion of ‘I Can Do It With a Broken Heart’ and ‘Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?’. 

However, most of the other songs blend together and I can’t listen to most of the album without either cringing or getting irrationally mad. I think it’s important to critique and express our true opinions the popular culture without being attacked for sake of attacking. People are allowed to like things, just as others are allowed to not like things, even if it doesn’t agree with you.